Self-esteem falls on a continuum from high to low. Some people love themselves, and others loathe their very beings. Some people’s self-esteems are based on who is around, and others’ self-esteems are based on the situations in which they find themselves. Before we move forward, we must first define self-esteem. Dictionary.com defines positive self-esteem as a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect.
In this segment, we will look at those who are uncomfortable with themselves. Take a moment to think about someone who puts himself down in order to be accepted by those around him. When someone compliments him, he retorts with a negative aspect of himself. When someone commends him for doing something well, he immediately points out his past mistakes. At times, he will play dumb so as not to draw positive attention to himself. He may not mind being noticed, but he only wants to be noticed in a negative light. Living up to high standards is beyond his comprehension because he feels if he raises the bar, he’ll make someone else feel uncomfortable.
It seems almost criminal for someone to treat himself so poorly. In fact, when one succumbs to these measures, he is abusive, and the recipient is self.
In order to correct the problem, a person must first realize that he is guilty of this wrong. He must listen to what he tells himself and others after he receives a compliment. He must listen at how he describes himself to others, and he must dissect the thoughts that frequent his mind. Once he notices a negative pattern, he must immediately replace his self-defeating thoughts or words with positive thoughts and words. A simple “thank-you” in response to a compliment is a good way to start.
Changing one’s opinion of oneself can be laborious, but it is worth the effort. If you belittle yourself in order to make someone else feel better, stop it now. You don’t have to elevate your worth beyond measure, but belittling yourself is criminal, and the one who suffers most is you!