Category Archives: Friends

Personal Growth

Sometimes We Outgrow The People, Places And Things Around Us. It May Be Hard To Move On When We Do, But If We Remain, We’ll Stunt Future Growth.

Books by Levon

 

Just Asking… (Are you wasting your time on the wrong people?)

Time is a precious commodity. However, some people squander their time by trying to encourage others to like them. They pretend to be who they are not, buy things they can’t afford, say things they don’t mean, go places they aren’t interested in, and do things they don’t want to do in order to impress others. Unbelievably, they will even violate their values in order to be accepted.

 

Isn’t it interesting that people will make such huge investments in relationships that reward them with pain, confusion, sadness and the like? These people simply do not realize that not everyone on the planet will like them, even if they were perfect and flawless (which none of us are).

 

As you examine your relationships, do you find yourself guilty of this infraction? Are your relationships adding to your life, or are they causing you to spiral downward? Do you have to pretend to be someone you are not in order to be accepted? Are you violating your values in order to belong? When you leave your relationships, are you drained and disillusioned? Do you rationalize that being with someone who degrades you is better than being with no one at all?

 

If you find yourself in these energy drainers, you may want to make a change. As mentioned earlier, your time is valuable. And if those around you can’t appreciate you for who you are, maybe you need to find better ways to invest your time.

Books by Levon

Just Asking… (Do you realize that visiting too much will weary your host?)

I read something the other night that compared visiting someone too much to overindulging with chocolate candy. That particular comparison never dawned on me; but as I mulled over the metaphor, I realized that the author made a valid point. In essence, he was suggesting that too much of a good thing can make you sick.

 

Don’t get me wrong, it’s wonderful to have friends and family with whom you can mingle and socialize. At times, it may be acceptable to pop in unannounced (depending on the person you’re visiting), but when you habitually  visit without an invitation, you are treading on thin ice. Even if the person doesn’t confront you directly, his body language may indicate that you are crowding him. He may become distant, even throwing sarcastic remarks that seem unrelated to what’s really bothering him. On the other hand, he may smile and say the right things, but his true feelings may reveal themselves in subtle ways.

 

You may be oblivious his subtle cues, and that only makes the situation worse. If he’s afraid of hurting your feelings, he will simmer in anger, or unexpectedly blow up at you for a seemingly insignificant reason.

 

Therefore, if there’s someone you love to visit, use wisdom. Don’t visit too often, and don’t stay too long. You always want your host’s doorbell to signal a welcomed guest and not an invading intruder.

Books by Levon